It's hard to find balance sometimes. Even when things are going well, balance is something we all need. I've been feeling very out of balance for the last couple of days. Is it working that defines me? If so, I feel very left out of my life. At the same time, letting it go and not worrying about work has felt really good for the past few days. But, it's all about balance. Now I don't think I have anything interesting to say... and, I've only been under the weather and out of the loop since Tuesday afternoon.
It's a strange feeling.
I want to do some things around the house but I keep getting tired easily. I haven't slept through the night since the drugs they gave me at the hospital. Mostly, it's being uncomfortable and waking up to move or throw off the covers or get up to go to the bathroom in my unending attempt to pee for everyone in the Nation.
Showers and cooking make me feel somewhat normal.
(Yesterday I made coconut rice. I didn't eat it, I just made it to feel like I did something!)
The lack of human interaction during the day is... well, it's boring! Bea's visit yesterday was great. And Wednesday night we didn't have game but people came over to talk about their characters and chill, which was nice. Today's been the worst. Feeling like I haven't done anything all week and wondering if I should be able to accomplish something for the day/week. Friends and Co-Workers tell you, 'go home and relax'. This isn't relaxing to me; this is like being stuck in box.
One can only read so many magazines, the TV is already on too much, the book I was reading is giving me nightmares and I probably shouldn't take myself out to a movie.
Thankfully we're having dinner at the Foye's tonight. I'm excited to see them and get out of the house. Tomorrow will be different, tomorrow I'm going to wake-up and decide to do something -- I don't care WHAT but, saints alive, I need something. This week has really got me unbalanced.
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