...giving thanks with the 'in-laws'...

Today was an exciting day. Once Tiste and I discovered that we wouldn't be able to go to NC for Thanksgiving, his mom and sisters were asking us up to Newport News to spend the day with them. I didn't want to pressure him to go because it's his family and he should make the choice.

At first, he said that we should go because he knew that I wanted to meet his mother. I didn't let that fly! I told him that if he wanted me to meet his mother and if he wanted to see his family then he should make the decision that we should go and that I was on board if that's what he wanted to do. Eventually, he said that he would like to go and our plans were made.

When I had him ask what we could bring, she said soda! SODA!?! Ack, I felt awkward not bringing a dish and I couldn't find a piece of pottery to give her this morning. I'm going to send her a card thanking her for having us though - that will make me feel better.

Regardless, Tiste was prepping me before hand on sibling names (HE HAS 7!!), not to stare at his step-dad's face (grease fire when he was a kid), not to speak Ebonics (because that's just be rude), and to be myself (because his family can smell fake a mile away). I was down with all of the above. He also prepped me on what kind of food to expect since it would be my first Afrocentric Thanksgiving AND that Black moms are like Jewish and Italian moms - they'll try to keep feeding you! *LOL*

We arrived just after 2pm and we were welcomed into the house by Donald Senior and I was introduced to siblings, a brother-in-law and a family friend. We then went into the kitchen were I got to meet Vanessa, Tiste's Mom. She was so happy to see Tiste that she almost cried. She choked it back though and said hello to me and gave me an awesome hug.

We chatted for a few moments before Tiste told her to tell me about the food spread - ham, turkey, mac and cheese, collards, corn pudding, corn bread, seafood salad, potato salad, deviled eggs, black-eyed peas, rolls, candied yams and, of course, stuffing! We had a good laugh when Tiste explained that he was almost dead on about the food and that I was shocked at the amounts of it for such a few amount of people. They asked me what I usually ate for Thanksgiving and I had to tell them that my preference will always be NC BBQ! But, that I did love turkey and it all looked fabulous. :)

We ate and had a great time... I heard stories about Tiste and the siblings from when they were young, stories about his beloved grandmother and quick witted banter between the family members. Vanessa and Candace asked me about my own family and I shared stories from my own childhood. We also told the story of how we had dated before when we were much younger which his sister Lillian-Michelle thought was very romantic. It was awesome, some random unexpected jewel that I found under a lumpy pillow. I'm trying not to cry when I say that I felt welcomed and loved by every single one of them.

After we ate, while we were watching the football game, Lillian-Michelle asked me if that's what we did in my family. I told her that usually the game was on with the sound low but that we often played cards or dominoes. Donald Jr quickly jumped up and was excited - he asked if I played Spades, and I do. So, he ran out to the store and got cards so I played Spades in the kitchen with the siblings and brother-in-law while Tiste watched the game with this step-dad and Mom.

Finally, we had to leave. I was actually sad that we had to go, but we needed to get back to Norfolk so I could pack for my trip to visit the parents this weekend. There was so much love and laughter there, it was intoxicating!

But, I have been officially requested to come over next year and help cook on Wednesday then spend the night, we have been invited for Christmas breakfast (which they know we might not make), instructed that under no circumstances am I to break Tiste's heart, I spilled drink of the carpet, was told that the girls needed nieces or nephews and his sisters repeatedly called Vanessa my mother-in-law.

In response to all of that... Tiste kissed me, giggled and said, 'welcome to the family'.

*sniff*

Grace



All the food!



My 'mother-in-law' Ms. Vanessa



Tiste and his brother, Donald Jr



Tiste being told by his mother that he was a guest "this time" and that he would NOT do dishes!


After dinner chat...



Candace in the foreground and Lillian-Michelle in the background


Lillian-Michelle in her curlers with her husband



Me, all kinds of happy